RIP Crystal “Cryssy Dee” Cross
On April 2, we woke up to a social media post written by author and dancer Crystal “Cryssy Dee” Cross. Within a few hours, the post had gone viral.
“Hey y’all! I have attempted suicide for the third and final time, and this attempt was successful. Certain individuals will be contacted shortly by Sierra Hodges. There will be no funeral or celebration of life per my request. Just remember or not remember me however you please. Thanks y’all for the laughs, tears, and love, but I’ve always been on borrowed time…. And since I’m not a Christian, I don’t believe I’m going to heaven or hell. I’ve always wanted to be free….and now I’m free forever.”
“I chose the sea.” — Cryssy Dee
The world read every weighted word, and it left us broken. Her short message was riddled with pain and exhaustion from depression—and we felt it in every single word.
Cryssy isn’t the only one who struggled. Studies indicate that depression prevalence is high among Black individuals. While Black women experience higher depressive symptoms compared to their white counterparts, they are often underdiagnosed or misdiagnosed.
What I have noticed is that there are very few resources that share how we can support those who are suffering with actionable steps. What I do know is that community is necessary. Studies have shown that when individuals are part of supportive and loving communities, healing and transformation can take place.
I’m challenging each of you to get connected to a community and even consider building one and inviting others in. This isn’t about simply spending time with your clique, but about reaching out to other Black women with whom you can be vulnerable, who can help carry the heavy burdens of life. Let’s reach out to women who could benefit from community and have love and wisdom to share.
Consider reaching out to a former colleague, coworker, or neighbor you’d like to get to know. Try reconnecting with a friend or former classmate you haven’t seen in years.
Community doesn’t have to be a production. It can be as simple as coffee meetups, movie nights, a book club at a local library, or breakfast at a diner once every two months. It’s not the frequency that matters, but the consistency. When people know they have a place they can count on, it provides a sense of hope. Holding space for someone who may be lonely can change a life.
Additionally, you can also find community through church small groups and community organizations. Meetup.com offers social and professional meetups in local areas.
Let’s not take the distance of our friends and loved ones personally but seriously, as it can be one of the signs of depression. If you haven’t heard from someone, reach out. Instead of asking if they are okay, ask more open-ended questions, such as how they are feeling or what’s been going on. Listen without interruption, and without judgment.
If you are suffering from depression or dealing with suicidal thoughts, please don’t suffer in silence. Support is available:
- 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
- Call or text 988
- Please visit our website and connect with Rashida
Please know that each and every one of us is needed and necessary.
Rest in honor Crystal Cryssy Dee Cross.
