| Trauma bonds are found in all types of relationships and are amongst the most poisonous and co-dependent bonds that exist. People that are physical and/or emotional abusers are incapable of maintaining healthy relationships, so they rely on trauma bonds. Abusers establish bonds with those with low self-worth because they need their compliance and in this case, their compliance consists of silence. Their compliance allows the abuser to continue to abuse others and doesn’t require them to change. Those that form trauma bonds are individuals suffering from deep-rooted hurts and have experienced trauma in previous relationships. It’s the fear of being alone that keeps them invested in this toxic relationship. Trauma bonding says: -We are close because we gossip together -We are close because we accept the worst of each other -I accept your flaws and toxic behavior -No one else will believe your lies but me -We both refuse to change and grow -I don’t want to be alone-I cater to you and tiptoe around your triggers because I don’t want to offend you or lose you -You use guilt to convince me to do what you want me to do -You can count on me to see things your way -We are dependent on each other Trauma bonding brings out the worst in each person. It also sabotages and robs us of having other more meaningful relationships. One lives a less than purposeful and meaningful life when we are heavily invested in a trauma bond. Set yourself free today! |